"I Assassin Down The Avenue"

Had a blast at my aunt & uncle's place last night. Food was consumed, songs were sung, and a splendid time was had by all. Since they actually played songs I knew last night (my uncle's bandmate, Joe, has a tendency to play obscure bluegrass and country tunes all the time if given a choice), which I thought was ironic since my singing voice (never very strong at the best of times) was rather ragged last night due to illness. Ah well, I still had fun, and I still sang, and no one complained aloud, so no worries.

If, like me, you don't really care that much for football (and downright despise 99% of all football fans), Norman, Oklahoma is not the place you want to be on a Saturday during football season. If, however, you have to be in Norman on any given Saturday, one of the worst places to be is within two blocks of the stadium. It means you can hear the game, you can't move for the crowds, and cars are parked up and down each side of the street, regardless of whether it's legal to park there or not. Beer is being consumed. Fight songs are being slurred. Insults are being hurled. There is a general hurly-burly to the proceedings. You cannot escape football in Norman, you can only hope to contain the damage it does to your psyche.

I managed to avoid opening day last weekened by dint of being in Midwest City at the time, a nice trick if you can manage it. But not this week--no, this week, I am entrenched within my apartment, and I'm not leaving until at least 11.00 or midnight tonight. There's just no reason or way it's going to happen. Folks will be parking outside of my apartment today, I'm sure--they always do, since we're only a couple of blocks from the stadium and, technically, since it's university property, they can't be charged for parking (except by the university, which, for some reason, does not charge folks to park in here. It's odd that such a money-grubbing institution as OU wouldn't charge for parking here, when all the private land in the vicinity makes a freakin' killing on selling parking spaces in their front yards to football fans. But I digress). I'm tempted to go stand out in front of the apartment holding a sign which reads:

"For $5, I'll watch your car. For $10, I'll make sure nothing happens to it."

I think I could make a killing. Or end up with a severe beating. Whatever.

~chuck

Song of the Moment: Wilco, "Radio Cure"